Greetings one and all again to a new blog by yours truely, the mad runner and I hope you all had a great Christmas and surrounded by all of your loved ones.
As the year, 2011 is about the end and the upcoming 2012 is approaching, I find myself ready for what is to come and what I will endure. Whatever it may be, it will sure be a test of what I am capable of.....providing hope and courage to many and hopefully inspire many to do the same.
Do I have a New Years Resolution? My only resolution is do my best for everyone and help provide many smiles to those who need it. My resolution is for everyone and not myself.
My Christmas present is always the same of the past few years, my family and friends. I do not ask for that much and this year, all I wanted was strength provided in me to face my upcoming challenge. I do not have any doubt in myself and my ability, I just want the strength to make it through the rough times and I rely on my faith to be my strength.
With the upcoming training for the races approaching in just a few days, I look at what I have to do to get ready and some say that I have 4 months to get ready and that is plenty of time but not with what I need to do. I am looking to run the half marathon in 2 hours or better. And after doing a lot of calculations and looking at new things to try, I will be in the best shape I have ever been in.
Looking at the new workouts, I will be introducing some new cardio for core strength and then working on endurance and of course, toning up with the weights and med ball routine. But with the new workouts, I am leaning towards a new diet and then doing yoga, pilates and other conditioning workouts.
Will this hurt? You bet but I look forward to it because like they always say, "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger." And I am looking to head this new routine head on and willing to put in much work to get better.
And to some, I appreciate your kind words, thoughts and prayers for everything. My words cannot express how much motivation I have been receiving on behalf of all of you.
And to some who are tuning in, I have started a fan page on facebook, the page will update many on what will be going on, just in case the news feed changes like a drop of a hat but tune in and be a part of the Team Heart Militia brigade. Like the team on facebook and hopefully, I will hear from you all.
P.S. I did run a total of 13.5 miles on Christmas Eve and Christmas day, feeling stronger and I am happy! Even with my awesome red running tights. Picture to come soon.
Monday, December 26, 2011
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
A confession
Greetings one and all again to a new blog installment from the mad runner and I hope you all are doing well and with Christmas and New Years just right around the corner, I wish you all a Merry Christmas, a Happy New Years and safe travels to many who are venturing out to many destinations.
This new blog is going to take you into a perspective and questions that has been brought to my attention for the past few months and I feel like it has to be addressed and it is a subject that I have been a personal attacks by many I assumed were good friends in the running industry.
Growing up and listening to old war stories of my biological father making his destiny of going to the Olympic games in 1984 and about how great he was. And to all runners who start out always would think that one day, I will make it to the Olympics and it's a dream some have taken and try to make it a reality. Was it mine? Of course and I worked hard during the last round to make it as far as I could and did I fail? Yes. I am not ashamed to say that I took a shot and didn't get it because I knew I wasn't ready for that life or that achievement. And after that, I battled through my own demons and like many, that dream felt like a nightmare because of what it is and what it isn't.
For awhile, I felt like I let everyone down, my family, friends, and most of all, my tribal nation and it took me awhile to accept that I failed big time but a wise man once told me that, "if you fall, fall hard and get back up because you have to sink to an absolute low before things start looking up." My mental and spiritual game was back in and wanted to get back into running and find myself again because when you are set out on a goal that to some, seem impossible, but to you....it is more than just a passion. I got back into running for the main reason why I got into it, for the pure joy of it, not money, gold medals, sponsorships, and the spotlight. Running has never been that to me because to me, it was a way of life, an addiction because when it came from running 3 miles to 15 miles a day and averaging 30-60 miles a week, you are amazed on how far you can push yourself.
Back in October of this year, I was approached by a good friend I met years ago when he was training for a spot on the Olympic team back in 2008 and he called me out of the blue because he found my contact info, and he wanted to see what I was up to and I told him about the half marathon and others races and he said, "I was worried that old age would've put you in retirement." After an hour of joking and catching up, he told me that his main purpose was the call was to offer me a spot at the USATF (United States Track and Field) organization is hosting a masters outdoor track and field event in Bloomington, Indiana in May of 2012 and he said if I ran the race (800 meters) and placed in the top 5, I would have earned my spot to the Olympic Trials in Eugene, Oregon and see how I do from there.
After we talked, it was the constant thought in my head....the shot to relive my dream, again. But at what cost? And after a month, it was a distant thought in my head because I was focusing my time and energy on my charities I am running for and that was my main concern.
A week ago, I got a phone call from him again and he told me he didn't want to rush me but he needed to know before we draw up the paperwork, get a physical and make an appearance with the boys in Beaverton, Oregon but I told him I had to respectfully decline the offer because it is not that I am honored to be asked to do it again but I have a good thing going for me and if I was to take on this HUGE opportunity, I would have to drop many races scheduled for the charities and I would've turned my back on those who need me. I made a promise to them and I am not going back on it.
And since I made my decision, I have told some of my running buddies stationed over many parts of the states, they are quite upset with me because they have said, "You do not turn down an offer like this. You are an idiot. You must be wrong in the head. You mean well with what you are doing but you cannot turn down this offer. You are not making any money doing these races, the money is the other path." And I got so freaking tired of the hate I was receiving because it has NOTHING to do with the money or the fame. It has to do with standing up for many and to stand beside them when times are tough and for every smile and everything that makes them feel better and if what I am doing helps them, it is worth any gold medals I would ever try to work for.
I will tell you this, I have no regrets in my actions because this is where I belong and I will stand my ground because it is what I believe in and there is no way in hell that I am quitting. And to those who still hate on me, I hope one day you will understand why I did this. And to those who are still standing next to me, I thank you.
I hope this blog will make you understand what I go through on somewhat a daily basis and the battles I endure but my sacrifices and everything I go through is worth it, down to the last drop of sweat and last ounce of energy. I have my beliefs and I respect them and I hope you do the same too. And if people start to hate on you or your beliefs, remember this, I would rather be hated on for something that I am rather than being loved for something that I am not.
This new blog is going to take you into a perspective and questions that has been brought to my attention for the past few months and I feel like it has to be addressed and it is a subject that I have been a personal attacks by many I assumed were good friends in the running industry.
Growing up and listening to old war stories of my biological father making his destiny of going to the Olympic games in 1984 and about how great he was. And to all runners who start out always would think that one day, I will make it to the Olympics and it's a dream some have taken and try to make it a reality. Was it mine? Of course and I worked hard during the last round to make it as far as I could and did I fail? Yes. I am not ashamed to say that I took a shot and didn't get it because I knew I wasn't ready for that life or that achievement. And after that, I battled through my own demons and like many, that dream felt like a nightmare because of what it is and what it isn't.
For awhile, I felt like I let everyone down, my family, friends, and most of all, my tribal nation and it took me awhile to accept that I failed big time but a wise man once told me that, "if you fall, fall hard and get back up because you have to sink to an absolute low before things start looking up." My mental and spiritual game was back in and wanted to get back into running and find myself again because when you are set out on a goal that to some, seem impossible, but to you....it is more than just a passion. I got back into running for the main reason why I got into it, for the pure joy of it, not money, gold medals, sponsorships, and the spotlight. Running has never been that to me because to me, it was a way of life, an addiction because when it came from running 3 miles to 15 miles a day and averaging 30-60 miles a week, you are amazed on how far you can push yourself.
Back in October of this year, I was approached by a good friend I met years ago when he was training for a spot on the Olympic team back in 2008 and he called me out of the blue because he found my contact info, and he wanted to see what I was up to and I told him about the half marathon and others races and he said, "I was worried that old age would've put you in retirement." After an hour of joking and catching up, he told me that his main purpose was the call was to offer me a spot at the USATF (United States Track and Field) organization is hosting a masters outdoor track and field event in Bloomington, Indiana in May of 2012 and he said if I ran the race (800 meters) and placed in the top 5, I would have earned my spot to the Olympic Trials in Eugene, Oregon and see how I do from there.
After we talked, it was the constant thought in my head....the shot to relive my dream, again. But at what cost? And after a month, it was a distant thought in my head because I was focusing my time and energy on my charities I am running for and that was my main concern.
A week ago, I got a phone call from him again and he told me he didn't want to rush me but he needed to know before we draw up the paperwork, get a physical and make an appearance with the boys in Beaverton, Oregon but I told him I had to respectfully decline the offer because it is not that I am honored to be asked to do it again but I have a good thing going for me and if I was to take on this HUGE opportunity, I would have to drop many races scheduled for the charities and I would've turned my back on those who need me. I made a promise to them and I am not going back on it.
And since I made my decision, I have told some of my running buddies stationed over many parts of the states, they are quite upset with me because they have said, "You do not turn down an offer like this. You are an idiot. You must be wrong in the head. You mean well with what you are doing but you cannot turn down this offer. You are not making any money doing these races, the money is the other path." And I got so freaking tired of the hate I was receiving because it has NOTHING to do with the money or the fame. It has to do with standing up for many and to stand beside them when times are tough and for every smile and everything that makes them feel better and if what I am doing helps them, it is worth any gold medals I would ever try to work for.
I will tell you this, I have no regrets in my actions because this is where I belong and I will stand my ground because it is what I believe in and there is no way in hell that I am quitting. And to those who still hate on me, I hope one day you will understand why I did this. And to those who are still standing next to me, I thank you.
I hope this blog will make you understand what I go through on somewhat a daily basis and the battles I endure but my sacrifices and everything I go through is worth it, down to the last drop of sweat and last ounce of energy. I have my beliefs and I respect them and I hope you do the same too. And if people start to hate on you or your beliefs, remember this, I would rather be hated on for something that I am rather than being loved for something that I am not.
Sunday, December 18, 2011
Thank you
Greetings one and all, and welcome to another installment of the blog of this mad runner. And I trust you all had a great weekend.
What can I say about my weekend? Well, I started up jogging after the dreaded stomach virus I've had from last week. Still a bit woozy but I felt fine jogging both Friday and yesterday. I went for a good 20 minutes both days and was proud to know that I felt good after every day. Still monitoring my health and start making that climb back to 40-50 miles a week. No hurry on my end though, I've got nothing but time......well, until the mid January as I go back into the half marathon training routine.
This new installment for my blog is something I believe is overdue and I hope that to those this is dedicated to can understand the emotion behind my passion for running. This blog is about thanking those who got me this far.
To my dear mother, you have always been my fan, supporter and most of all, my best friend. Even when my days growing up was tough without a father who stayed, you were the person I looked up to and seen something that I've always wanted to be, a fighter. To be a person who took on her children and made them great in their own ways, I thank you for everything you are and will always be, a part of me. I love you.
To my grandmother, you are the glue that holds this family together because without you, there wouldn't be a family. You were married to a great man who to this day, I still admire because of his life, love and legacy, us. Having you as a grandmother made me as a child growing up, understand what means the world to everyone, their culture and you brought that out of me in more ways than I could imagined. I can't wait to see you and hear you laugh again.
To my sisters and my baby brother, you guys are the best I could ever ask for in this world and the next because we've had some great times together and what amazes me is that we've always had a great connection. You all are the engine that drives me today when I am at my lowest. I miss you all and await to see you all again.
To my uncles, aunts and cousins, growing up with you all made a childhood seem like an amusement park, everything just exciting and fun. Along the way, it was more than just blood between us all, it was our interaction, that some of my cousins felt like brothers and sisters and I couldn't ask for anything more.
To my teachers and coaches, thank you all for believing in me and helping me persue life in a different aspect than I'd imagined at the time. With your faith in me in my knowledge, gifts and achievements, you helped me get through the school years with such fun and beliefs.
To my adopted family, thank you deeply for taking me in as a friend first and being considered as family has made me a better man because of the love you have shared with me. You all are my inspiration and I thank God for people like you, to accept me as I am and never giving up on me. Words cannot express my gratitude for you all!
To my awesome friends here in Washburn, Bismarck, Minot, Fargo, Grand Forks, all over North Dakota, South Dakota and overseas, thank you for taking this history nerd and for being such awesome people. Even with your busy lives, you still take time out to talk with me or share some great laughs with. To the many more good times in store for us all!
To my fellow supporters or "roadies" as I call them, thank you so much for your kind words, your emails, text messages. Without you, I wouldn't be where I am at this moment. You make me appreciate having supporters all over the states and countries too! Even when I feel like I am at my worst, you are always there to bring me back up and when I run, I always feel you around me. And please forgive me, I am not so used to having many who cheer me on or having a support base of those who are fans. Thank you for believing in me, it means the world to me and if I could just make you proud of what I do, I will do my absolute best!
To my critics, yes, you. Thank you for always saying what is on your mind and it helps me for motivation when I run because I know that the next day, it will give you something to write about. Your negativity does bring out the best in me because it goes to show you, everyone is not perfect and you don't even have to know me to like me but that is your own opinion and I respect it.
And finally, thanks to God because without accepting both God and Jesus into my life, I would have no purpose on this Earth but with both in my corner, I am invincible. My faith is the strongest part of myself, nothing can ever break it.
And to those who are reading this in other countries, I say thank you, in your language and forgive me if I am not fluent.
Gracias
спасибо
Terima kasih
Danke
ขอบคุณ
obrigado
Just a complete thank you to you all! And thank you again for tuning into this new installment and I wish you all a great day and be warned, training pics are what is to come in the next few weeks.
What can I say about my weekend? Well, I started up jogging after the dreaded stomach virus I've had from last week. Still a bit woozy but I felt fine jogging both Friday and yesterday. I went for a good 20 minutes both days and was proud to know that I felt good after every day. Still monitoring my health and start making that climb back to 40-50 miles a week. No hurry on my end though, I've got nothing but time......well, until the mid January as I go back into the half marathon training routine.
This new installment for my blog is something I believe is overdue and I hope that to those this is dedicated to can understand the emotion behind my passion for running. This blog is about thanking those who got me this far.
To my dear mother, you have always been my fan, supporter and most of all, my best friend. Even when my days growing up was tough without a father who stayed, you were the person I looked up to and seen something that I've always wanted to be, a fighter. To be a person who took on her children and made them great in their own ways, I thank you for everything you are and will always be, a part of me. I love you.
To my grandmother, you are the glue that holds this family together because without you, there wouldn't be a family. You were married to a great man who to this day, I still admire because of his life, love and legacy, us. Having you as a grandmother made me as a child growing up, understand what means the world to everyone, their culture and you brought that out of me in more ways than I could imagined. I can't wait to see you and hear you laugh again.
To my sisters and my baby brother, you guys are the best I could ever ask for in this world and the next because we've had some great times together and what amazes me is that we've always had a great connection. You all are the engine that drives me today when I am at my lowest. I miss you all and await to see you all again.
To my uncles, aunts and cousins, growing up with you all made a childhood seem like an amusement park, everything just exciting and fun. Along the way, it was more than just blood between us all, it was our interaction, that some of my cousins felt like brothers and sisters and I couldn't ask for anything more.
To my teachers and coaches, thank you all for believing in me and helping me persue life in a different aspect than I'd imagined at the time. With your faith in me in my knowledge, gifts and achievements, you helped me get through the school years with such fun and beliefs.
To my adopted family, thank you deeply for taking me in as a friend first and being considered as family has made me a better man because of the love you have shared with me. You all are my inspiration and I thank God for people like you, to accept me as I am and never giving up on me. Words cannot express my gratitude for you all!
To my awesome friends here in Washburn, Bismarck, Minot, Fargo, Grand Forks, all over North Dakota, South Dakota and overseas, thank you for taking this history nerd and for being such awesome people. Even with your busy lives, you still take time out to talk with me or share some great laughs with. To the many more good times in store for us all!
To my fellow supporters or "roadies" as I call them, thank you so much for your kind words, your emails, text messages. Without you, I wouldn't be where I am at this moment. You make me appreciate having supporters all over the states and countries too! Even when I feel like I am at my worst, you are always there to bring me back up and when I run, I always feel you around me. And please forgive me, I am not so used to having many who cheer me on or having a support base of those who are fans. Thank you for believing in me, it means the world to me and if I could just make you proud of what I do, I will do my absolute best!
To my critics, yes, you. Thank you for always saying what is on your mind and it helps me for motivation when I run because I know that the next day, it will give you something to write about. Your negativity does bring out the best in me because it goes to show you, everyone is not perfect and you don't even have to know me to like me but that is your own opinion and I respect it.
And finally, thanks to God because without accepting both God and Jesus into my life, I would have no purpose on this Earth but with both in my corner, I am invincible. My faith is the strongest part of myself, nothing can ever break it.
And to those who are reading this in other countries, I say thank you, in your language and forgive me if I am not fluent.
Gracias
спасибо
Terima kasih
Danke
ขอบคุณ
obrigado
Just a complete thank you to you all! And thank you again for tuning into this new installment and I wish you all a great day and be warned, training pics are what is to come in the next few weeks.
Friday, December 16, 2011
Having a mohawk is awesome!!
You know the old cliche, a good haircut will open doors for you? Well, I never believed it beacuse I think I've had one too many haircuts and not many doors were being opened. But alas, a mohawk has opened a door for me and to think, my own mother was against me having a mohawk. Heh, goes to show her right?
Sometimes, what mother knows best doesn't quite suit the haircut situation. Well, for me in that sense. Even though everything else is correct on what a mother knows best, life and love.
Growing up, I've always had spikey hair that looked like a ficus plant or an anime character on television but that was my style and I always got used to it. I've even had slick back hair and yes, even dyed hair, blonde, red and orange (being young and stupid). Now that I am older and wiser, I still want to try other things! And no, nothing too drastic like dreadlocks or an afro (maybe).
As a runner, you're not always known for having a sense of style because you just wear what is comfortable and what is you. Those who are too flashy with their shoes do stand out more but not always in a good sense but at times, us runners do wear something crazy because we like to have fun. I have seen runners wear running skirts, different types of tights, socks, and of course, for everyone, hairstyles.
For me, I always had shorter style hair now, which means, a buzzcut style. I've had the shorter hair because I sweat a lot and this was easier to manage and as of late, I grew the mohawk for fun, for the kids here in the town I live in. And what started out as fun has grown into something bigger than I have expected,
When I am not running, I do get some weird looks from many about my haircut and to me, I am always thinking that they are thinking I am a weird person or rebellious, I just laugh and smile because shows what they know! But there are times where little kids smile at me and giggle and ask me about it, if it is real or what my mother thinks about it. I laugh and smile and always tell them that my mother thinks it is just as great as I am.
I did have to laugh and smile that a few weeks ago, I went for a run and some kids went by me and asked me for my autograph because I was known as the guy who runs a lot and has a cool mohawk. I felt like an instant celebrity, all because of my mohawk. And for awhile in this town, I was known as the guy who runs a lot and hence my new Indian nickname, Jeff Runs A Lot. Now, I am known as the guy who runs a lot with an awesome mohawk.
For the past 2 months of growing it out, it has been fun to play around with the mohawk, others enjoy it and saying that this hairstyle suits me well, I have become attached to it and to tell you the truth, I was almost considering shaving it off because my racing season was over until April but I've had a lot of people just say, "Keep it. Don't shave it." It has become my trademark and I feel proud to have it.
I even got a person who is into making skull caps or beanies for winter time and thought of a great idea with myself, to make a beanie cap, for mohawks! That there will be an opening for mohawks to show on through. That people can still see your mohawk and still have your ears and the rest of your head protected from the colder temperatures. It was a fun idea and I cannot wait to see what he comes up with.
Here is the progress of having a mohawk for the past 2 months. Or as the kids call it, Hawkness. I was planning on growing the sides out for a bit but having a photo shoot here in town, I was asked to shave off the sides for more of the mohawk effect. Quite funny actually.
This blog is not encouraging many to have a mohawk, find your own hairstyle and be yourself. You will be shocked on how much people have admire both your hairstyle and you.
And for those who actually have mohawks, I do highly recommend this hair gel. Got 2b, it feels like hair gel but it holds like glue and I found it at Walmart for almost 5 bucks.
Sometimes, what mother knows best doesn't quite suit the haircut situation. Well, for me in that sense. Even though everything else is correct on what a mother knows best, life and love.
Growing up, I've always had spikey hair that looked like a ficus plant or an anime character on television but that was my style and I always got used to it. I've even had slick back hair and yes, even dyed hair, blonde, red and orange (being young and stupid). Now that I am older and wiser, I still want to try other things! And no, nothing too drastic like dreadlocks or an afro (maybe).
As a runner, you're not always known for having a sense of style because you just wear what is comfortable and what is you. Those who are too flashy with their shoes do stand out more but not always in a good sense but at times, us runners do wear something crazy because we like to have fun. I have seen runners wear running skirts, different types of tights, socks, and of course, for everyone, hairstyles.
For me, I always had shorter style hair now, which means, a buzzcut style. I've had the shorter hair because I sweat a lot and this was easier to manage and as of late, I grew the mohawk for fun, for the kids here in the town I live in. And what started out as fun has grown into something bigger than I have expected,
When I am not running, I do get some weird looks from many about my haircut and to me, I am always thinking that they are thinking I am a weird person or rebellious, I just laugh and smile because shows what they know! But there are times where little kids smile at me and giggle and ask me about it, if it is real or what my mother thinks about it. I laugh and smile and always tell them that my mother thinks it is just as great as I am.
I did have to laugh and smile that a few weeks ago, I went for a run and some kids went by me and asked me for my autograph because I was known as the guy who runs a lot and has a cool mohawk. I felt like an instant celebrity, all because of my mohawk. And for awhile in this town, I was known as the guy who runs a lot and hence my new Indian nickname, Jeff Runs A Lot. Now, I am known as the guy who runs a lot with an awesome mohawk.
For the past 2 months of growing it out, it has been fun to play around with the mohawk, others enjoy it and saying that this hairstyle suits me well, I have become attached to it and to tell you the truth, I was almost considering shaving it off because my racing season was over until April but I've had a lot of people just say, "Keep it. Don't shave it." It has become my trademark and I feel proud to have it.
I even got a person who is into making skull caps or beanies for winter time and thought of a great idea with myself, to make a beanie cap, for mohawks! That there will be an opening for mohawks to show on through. That people can still see your mohawk and still have your ears and the rest of your head protected from the colder temperatures. It was a fun idea and I cannot wait to see what he comes up with.
This blog is not encouraging many to have a mohawk, find your own hairstyle and be yourself. You will be shocked on how much people have admire both your hairstyle and you.
And for those who actually have mohawks, I do highly recommend this hair gel. Got 2b, it feels like hair gel but it holds like glue and I found it at Walmart for almost 5 bucks.
Thanks again for tuning in for another blog by the mad runner. I hope this has provided some entertainment for you all. Until we meet again, find your finish line and finish strong!
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
My fears and healing up
Greetings to all and once again, welcome to another informative blog about a mad runner who now has a diary? When I came up with the title for my blog, I guess I didn't think it over clearly because men do not keep diaries, they keep journals. It makes me sound like a 16 year old who keeps secrets from my parents but that is not the case whatsoever.
With a stream of new emails and comments on those emails from those who have been supportive, I thank you again for sending me stories, links, and informative news. One question that I have received from time and time again is, "Do you fear anything?" And to answer that truthfully, yes, I do.
I do feel fear like everyone does, I mean, I am human. I think that fear is more than just a feeling, to me, it is something that pushes me, almost like a force of energy. But growing up, fear is what plagued me at times. So, to those just tuning in, this is a personal part of me that I will rarely talk about it.
Growing up, I had a lot of fear because living on the reservation, you often become full of fear because of what you experienced from year to year. I would often fear that I would become an alcoholic, a drug user/dealer, or even when I got into my early 20's is that I would be stuck there for the rest of my life. I mean, the reservation is my home and I love my home because my family are there but I always knew I had potential to become somebody. Even in my high school yearbook, I was nominated and won, "Most Likely To Succeed" and to live up to other expectations became my drive and my fear. My fear was to fail and end up back on the reservation for many to say, "He failed, like we expected him to."
That hung above my head like an unwanted halo because of the pressure. And from then on, I started to work a lot and harder. To make sure my foundation was strong and nothing could ever take away my dream. But as I grew older and wiser, I let go of that fear because if I had fail, I wouldn't end up back on the reservation, that I would find a way to make it work the second, third or how many tries I took. My risks that I took were my own, not anyone else's.
Another fear that plagued me a lot was that I would end up like my biological father, he is a good man, no disrespect but growing up, a lot of people would always tell me that I would end up like him. In their eyes, they seen him as great talent and potential wasted. In high school, I would always tell myself, "You will not end up like your father, you are going to be something greater." During hard times, my internal words got me through.
I learned that once you let go of your fears, you are more happier and willing to push past limits no one ever thought you could take. And to some who expected you to fail, when you prove them wrong, no amount of money can ever be enough for that priceless moment. I've had a few of those moments and very proud to say that any expectations that anyone had to put on me were at times, pressure but they are what everyone has, opinions. To me, opinions are like dreams, everyone has one from time to time.
My recent fear? My health. Through the years of wear and tear and being young and careless, my muscles are not like they used to be. When I ran, I would often run when I was injured or sick and all I wanted to do was prove that nothing could ever stop me and at times today, I still feel that way. But with my neck and shoulder issues, it is not the case much anymore. But something odd has happened and I do hope it keeps progressing better was my legs. My family has the case of bad knees and I've had one knee go wrong but lately, I can still run hard on it and very lucky.
With my recent sickness that took a lot out of me, my health became my fear again and being how it was my chest that was hurting more. And having my best friend pass away from a heart attack because of his heart, I got scared because with the doctors monitoring my heart murmur, to make sure I do not have any complications that lead up to heart disease, it gets scary at times.
As of recent, I have been getting emails from many that show in detail of those runners who ran half marathons and full marathons who have passed away during a race because their heart couldn't take much more. I guess that hit me hard because it is a race that I am looking to do, 6 times in 2012.
I know, as a man who has a lot to do, I shouldn't have much fear but I try not to think much about it. But one fear is something everyone fears, the unknown.
I hope I did not go into too much detail there. Beyond my fear is my strength and my passion. My focus is there and knowing what I have to do, heal up, get healthy and stronger. April is approaching and I am excited, I miss running already. If you could contain my energy for how excited I get for my races, you could power 3 full cities for months. It is what drives me to my destiny.
And on a positive side, the article and photo shoot are done and here is a sneak peek in a picture form. The article will be in an electronic format that I will provide for you all.
Thank you all for reading the never ending blog of this mad runner.
With a stream of new emails and comments on those emails from those who have been supportive, I thank you again for sending me stories, links, and informative news. One question that I have received from time and time again is, "Do you fear anything?" And to answer that truthfully, yes, I do.
I do feel fear like everyone does, I mean, I am human. I think that fear is more than just a feeling, to me, it is something that pushes me, almost like a force of energy. But growing up, fear is what plagued me at times. So, to those just tuning in, this is a personal part of me that I will rarely talk about it.
Growing up, I had a lot of fear because living on the reservation, you often become full of fear because of what you experienced from year to year. I would often fear that I would become an alcoholic, a drug user/dealer, or even when I got into my early 20's is that I would be stuck there for the rest of my life. I mean, the reservation is my home and I love my home because my family are there but I always knew I had potential to become somebody. Even in my high school yearbook, I was nominated and won, "Most Likely To Succeed" and to live up to other expectations became my drive and my fear. My fear was to fail and end up back on the reservation for many to say, "He failed, like we expected him to."
That hung above my head like an unwanted halo because of the pressure. And from then on, I started to work a lot and harder. To make sure my foundation was strong and nothing could ever take away my dream. But as I grew older and wiser, I let go of that fear because if I had fail, I wouldn't end up back on the reservation, that I would find a way to make it work the second, third or how many tries I took. My risks that I took were my own, not anyone else's.
Another fear that plagued me a lot was that I would end up like my biological father, he is a good man, no disrespect but growing up, a lot of people would always tell me that I would end up like him. In their eyes, they seen him as great talent and potential wasted. In high school, I would always tell myself, "You will not end up like your father, you are going to be something greater." During hard times, my internal words got me through.
I learned that once you let go of your fears, you are more happier and willing to push past limits no one ever thought you could take. And to some who expected you to fail, when you prove them wrong, no amount of money can ever be enough for that priceless moment. I've had a few of those moments and very proud to say that any expectations that anyone had to put on me were at times, pressure but they are what everyone has, opinions. To me, opinions are like dreams, everyone has one from time to time.
My recent fear? My health. Through the years of wear and tear and being young and careless, my muscles are not like they used to be. When I ran, I would often run when I was injured or sick and all I wanted to do was prove that nothing could ever stop me and at times today, I still feel that way. But with my neck and shoulder issues, it is not the case much anymore. But something odd has happened and I do hope it keeps progressing better was my legs. My family has the case of bad knees and I've had one knee go wrong but lately, I can still run hard on it and very lucky.
With my recent sickness that took a lot out of me, my health became my fear again and being how it was my chest that was hurting more. And having my best friend pass away from a heart attack because of his heart, I got scared because with the doctors monitoring my heart murmur, to make sure I do not have any complications that lead up to heart disease, it gets scary at times.
As of recent, I have been getting emails from many that show in detail of those runners who ran half marathons and full marathons who have passed away during a race because their heart couldn't take much more. I guess that hit me hard because it is a race that I am looking to do, 6 times in 2012.
I know, as a man who has a lot to do, I shouldn't have much fear but I try not to think much about it. But one fear is something everyone fears, the unknown.
I hope I did not go into too much detail there. Beyond my fear is my strength and my passion. My focus is there and knowing what I have to do, heal up, get healthy and stronger. April is approaching and I am excited, I miss running already. If you could contain my energy for how excited I get for my races, you could power 3 full cities for months. It is what drives me to my destiny.
Thank you all for reading the never ending blog of this mad runner.
Sunday, December 11, 2011
I will be back
Greetings to all again, I apologize if it has been a few days since I have posted on this blog and I appreciate everyone who has read this never ending blog of mine.
What new has happen since the last time I had left you all? Well, ever since I ran the 5k in Fargo last week, I started to feel some pain in my chest that would not go away and it came to a point where I couldn't breathe or do much of anything. On this past Thursday evening, I spent all night trying to calm this pain down and nothing seemed to help but on Friday morning, I went into the clinic to get checked out and after waiting and getting back the results, they have found that I had a serious sinus infection that had a lot of congestion building up by my lungs that when I breathed, it started to put a lot of pressure on my chest and caused the chest pains. And another reason why I couldn't breathe too well was because of my exercise induced asthma, caused by allergies many years ago and with those factors and of course, stress relations, all 3 issues caused me to feel like crap.
I was actually quite relieved to have this interesting piece of news because I was expecting something worse but I am fortunate it wasn't too serious. But after getting my prescription filled for my new inhaler and antibiotics, I met up with a good friend of mine who is the local editor of the newspaper, the Leader News and he said he wanted to touch base with me for sometime because of my charity work that is upcoming in racing. So, he did an interview on me with the intention to take a picture of me running. The interview lasted about an hour and a half and when we finished, we all went to lunch and even just having soup, I couldn't eat and I started to feel some pain in my abdomen and in my lower back. As I got back to my apartment, I started to cramp up all over, getting chills, a fever of 101, and of course, caught a stomach virus that put me out of everything and then spent 15 hours in my bathroom with my sickness.
A day after the whole ordeal, I started to feel weak, weaker than I am used to and to tell you the truth, I was scared because I am so used to it but I knew that I couldn't stop. That I had to make sure I was healthy again. I kept myself hydrated with water, Gatorade and Sprite and ate nothing but crackers.
What amazed the fill in doctor was that I ran a 5k with a bad sinus infection and still able to pull a wonderful time. She called it irresponsible and I can admit that it was irresponsible of me to do that. I guess in a way, my pride got in the way of my health and that will never happen again.
To those who have been worried, I apologize and you need not to worry about me. I may live alone, but I know how to take care of myself in times like this. I can be strong when it is needed and the word "weak" doesn't mean I am less than nothing, I am human, I make mistakes, I learn and I fight. It is just a reminder that even at my worst, I can still do my best to be better. If that makes any sense.
As for now, I am on a small vacation, until I start to feel a lot better, I am relaxing my body and my mind. Although, tomorrow, I may have a photo shoot to deal with, I am not putting myself in much danger and for the upcoming article for the Leader News, I will post that article for all of you who are not here to see it.
Thank you all for your support and your constant emails, again, words cannot not compare to what I feel right now.
What new has happen since the last time I had left you all? Well, ever since I ran the 5k in Fargo last week, I started to feel some pain in my chest that would not go away and it came to a point where I couldn't breathe or do much of anything. On this past Thursday evening, I spent all night trying to calm this pain down and nothing seemed to help but on Friday morning, I went into the clinic to get checked out and after waiting and getting back the results, they have found that I had a serious sinus infection that had a lot of congestion building up by my lungs that when I breathed, it started to put a lot of pressure on my chest and caused the chest pains. And another reason why I couldn't breathe too well was because of my exercise induced asthma, caused by allergies many years ago and with those factors and of course, stress relations, all 3 issues caused me to feel like crap.
I was actually quite relieved to have this interesting piece of news because I was expecting something worse but I am fortunate it wasn't too serious. But after getting my prescription filled for my new inhaler and antibiotics, I met up with a good friend of mine who is the local editor of the newspaper, the Leader News and he said he wanted to touch base with me for sometime because of my charity work that is upcoming in racing. So, he did an interview on me with the intention to take a picture of me running. The interview lasted about an hour and a half and when we finished, we all went to lunch and even just having soup, I couldn't eat and I started to feel some pain in my abdomen and in my lower back. As I got back to my apartment, I started to cramp up all over, getting chills, a fever of 101, and of course, caught a stomach virus that put me out of everything and then spent 15 hours in my bathroom with my sickness.
A day after the whole ordeal, I started to feel weak, weaker than I am used to and to tell you the truth, I was scared because I am so used to it but I knew that I couldn't stop. That I had to make sure I was healthy again. I kept myself hydrated with water, Gatorade and Sprite and ate nothing but crackers.
What amazed the fill in doctor was that I ran a 5k with a bad sinus infection and still able to pull a wonderful time. She called it irresponsible and I can admit that it was irresponsible of me to do that. I guess in a way, my pride got in the way of my health and that will never happen again.
To those who have been worried, I apologize and you need not to worry about me. I may live alone, but I know how to take care of myself in times like this. I can be strong when it is needed and the word "weak" doesn't mean I am less than nothing, I am human, I make mistakes, I learn and I fight. It is just a reminder that even at my worst, I can still do my best to be better. If that makes any sense.
As for now, I am on a small vacation, until I start to feel a lot better, I am relaxing my body and my mind. Although, tomorrow, I may have a photo shoot to deal with, I am not putting myself in much danger and for the upcoming article for the Leader News, I will post that article for all of you who are not here to see it.
Thank you all for your support and your constant emails, again, words cannot not compare to what I feel right now.
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
Some submitted questions
Welcome one and all again, to another viewing of the ever so blah blah blah blog! If you are reading this, I thank you because I haven't bored you out of your socks yet and to those I have bored, I apologize on behalf of myself, my country, and of my mother too.
Nonetheless, this new blog is going to feature some questions from viewers who have emailed me and to those who have missed my email address, it is jeffylube40@hotmail.com and yes, I do view emails from viewers of this blog. These questions are random and I have selected some to display for those who have emailed me. And please feel free to email me on anything.
1.) Who or what has influenced you to start running? Well, it all started with my father, Jeff Turning Heart Sr., he was a standout athletic runner back in my home state of South Dakota. But after many years, a lot of have influenced me, Billy Mills, Steve Prefontaine, Alan Webb, Frank Shorter, Josh Cox...the list can go on and on for me.
2.) What brand of shoes do you prefer to run in? That is an easy question, Nike. Nike was always my brand to wear growing up because at the time, as a kid, I liked the swoosh and it stuck with me. I wore Nikes from as a young runner to today. But to me, Nike was more than just a brand, I became and still a part of the Nike running circuit.
3.) Where did the idea of the mohawk start? Well, if you have read the recent blog I posted, Evolution of the mohawk, we wouldn't get addressing this question, would we? Just kidding, the mohawk started up as for fun last year, for league dart season. After awhile, I was asked if the mohawk was going to make a comeback and I thought about it and voila, mohawk is back and my good friends at Universal Athletic designed an awesome shirt that reads "Hawk Nation" with a guy with a mohawk as a graphic detail.
4.)Who has been your biggest supporter? Easy, my mother. Growing up, my mother was always my inspiration and supporter because she helped raise at the time, 4 kids, by herself. And I know with as busy as she was, she would always encourage me to be my best at my own standards. Every time I've had a bad race, she was there to rub my back and say, "You've done your best and I am so proud of you." Or when I was leaving for a race, she would always say, and to this day, "Run like the wind, never look back. Turn and burn." No matter the race, she supports me in it.
5.) What got you into running for charities? It all started with this past summer. I just got back into racing and trained for the 5k in Underwood during Harvest Fest and I lost a friend to suicide. I was distraught, angry, confused, anything but good. And after I ran that race, I've wanted a challenge, so, I was approached with running the half marathon in Bismarck, ND. As I did my research on the race, I looked online and the website had a link, "charities" and I looked at the different charities and respectfully, they didn't click with me right away but I chose one that wasn't on their list, suicide prevention. I then contacted those who ran a non-profit organization, the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention and got everything going, my donor wall, my contacting of many and next thing you know, I was at the race and it felt so great to run for something other than yourself. And after that, my thought was, "I love running for charities, to be able to give back to those who need it." And that is how I got into running for charities. Look for my upcoming races in 2012. They are going to be great!
6.) Team Heart Militia is your running squad, what does it mean? Well, Team Heart Militia was something I started for myself because it was a personal quest. It still means, if you're going to go through your own battles, you bring your heart with. Without your heart, the battle is lost. And as time went by, I would come up with my own design concepts, my own quotes and artwork on the shirts. To have a quote to help inspire many to do their best. I am very proud to say that I have 3 runners on my squad that do great and I now have 7 honorary members of my brigade.
7.) If you run while listening to music, what is on your playlist? Funny you should ask that, my playlist on my iPod is labeled as "workout" and it consists of many artists that get me going. I have artists like, Tinie Tempah, TobyMac, Chipmunk, Icon For Hire, The Game, Shinedown, Eminem, The Red Jumpsuit Appartus, Skillet, Living Colour, Pink, Avril Lavigne, Paramore, the All American Rejects, Rev Theory and of course, Kelly Clarkson. I listen to everything because I really do not have a genre I stick with. I am not biased. Just as long as I can relate to the song or feel their vibe in the music, I am good.
8.) Tell us something funny about you? Well, umm.....I do like to sing....and dance, at the most random moments. Call it geeky but music is my thing. There would be times where I would hear a song and I can't help it. Even though I get weird looks or laughs, I am confident in myself because it is out of fun and life should be like that, fun. And I would like to apologize to many who have seen me dance or have heard me sing before...I am sorry for that. I should come with a rating or a warning label across my chest. And I do make voices or come up with weird sayings, especially with my friend, Alan.
9.) Tell us something serious about you? At times, I am very grateful to be alive and doing what I love to do. There are moments where my reflection on my life is blurred and vivid because I had to grow up so quick and had to be strong at a young age. And that I have lost a lot of great people in my life and it sucks at times because they were always there for me, for awhile, I used to think that everything I touched, dies. But as I got in touch with my faith, I knew that just having them in my life was great enough to share what they taught me and stand for what they stood for too. And to this day, I still do not know my real father that well.
10.) What has been your best race? I always say this, because it is true. My best race is always my next. My races that I have done were great and phenomonal but you cannot put a label on a race as "your best" because the next race can be your best or the next one. I love my races, no matter the outcome because of my heart.
11.) Are you seeing someone special? Why? Are you asking me out? Just kidding. Well, at the moment, I just had a date with someone that was overdue because of various conflicts in schedules but who knows what is next? I haven't met that special someone yet.
12.) In your recent blog about losing weight, how did you go about doing it? What is your secret? My secret is this and it is not much of a secret now that I have told you. Don't think about the weight, think about the workouts. It is all a mental thing because when I started working out and running, the last thing on my mind was the weight. I was thinking about the next workouts. And next thing you know, I lost 14 pounds and then it was 20 pounds and then it was 30 pounds. And some days, I ate very healthy, raw vegetables, fruit, drank lots of water, I gave up using salt in my diet. It was brutal but it is the price you pay to run your best.
13.) What is your favorite movie to watch before a race? My favorite movies to watch are the Rocky Balboa movies, Without Limits, and Running Brave. Geeky, I know.
14.) What can we expect out of you in 2012? The very best that I can be. By April, you will see how great I can be and the great I can bring to many. Just watch.
15.) If you had a speech to give the youth who are looking to be runners, what advice would you give them? My advice would be my speech, that no matter how hard life is going to hit you, take those hits because if you can get up from those hits and keep on moving, you are already winning. Never sell yourself short because if you do, you're not going to cut it in the long run. The next fad is the next recycled item for pickup on garbage day. Use your heart, your mind and yourself to know how hard you can push yourself. And never lose faith, in yourself, your gift and your beliefs. And never give up, always give in.
Well, those are some of the condensed questions that I had to format into this blog without going into their email responses and to those who have emailed me questions, there you go. Some that are personal, I will email you back this week.
I hope you all enjoyed this new blog and to you critics, I am still smiling. Thank you.
Nonetheless, this new blog is going to feature some questions from viewers who have emailed me and to those who have missed my email address, it is jeffylube40@hotmail.com and yes, I do view emails from viewers of this blog. These questions are random and I have selected some to display for those who have emailed me. And please feel free to email me on anything.
1.) Who or what has influenced you to start running? Well, it all started with my father, Jeff Turning Heart Sr., he was a standout athletic runner back in my home state of South Dakota. But after many years, a lot of have influenced me, Billy Mills, Steve Prefontaine, Alan Webb, Frank Shorter, Josh Cox...the list can go on and on for me.
2.) What brand of shoes do you prefer to run in? That is an easy question, Nike. Nike was always my brand to wear growing up because at the time, as a kid, I liked the swoosh and it stuck with me. I wore Nikes from as a young runner to today. But to me, Nike was more than just a brand, I became and still a part of the Nike running circuit.
3.) Where did the idea of the mohawk start? Well, if you have read the recent blog I posted, Evolution of the mohawk, we wouldn't get addressing this question, would we? Just kidding, the mohawk started up as for fun last year, for league dart season. After awhile, I was asked if the mohawk was going to make a comeback and I thought about it and voila, mohawk is back and my good friends at Universal Athletic designed an awesome shirt that reads "Hawk Nation" with a guy with a mohawk as a graphic detail.
4.)Who has been your biggest supporter? Easy, my mother. Growing up, my mother was always my inspiration and supporter because she helped raise at the time, 4 kids, by herself. And I know with as busy as she was, she would always encourage me to be my best at my own standards. Every time I've had a bad race, she was there to rub my back and say, "You've done your best and I am so proud of you." Or when I was leaving for a race, she would always say, and to this day, "Run like the wind, never look back. Turn and burn." No matter the race, she supports me in it.
5.) What got you into running for charities? It all started with this past summer. I just got back into racing and trained for the 5k in Underwood during Harvest Fest and I lost a friend to suicide. I was distraught, angry, confused, anything but good. And after I ran that race, I've wanted a challenge, so, I was approached with running the half marathon in Bismarck, ND. As I did my research on the race, I looked online and the website had a link, "charities" and I looked at the different charities and respectfully, they didn't click with me right away but I chose one that wasn't on their list, suicide prevention. I then contacted those who ran a non-profit organization, the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention and got everything going, my donor wall, my contacting of many and next thing you know, I was at the race and it felt so great to run for something other than yourself. And after that, my thought was, "I love running for charities, to be able to give back to those who need it." And that is how I got into running for charities. Look for my upcoming races in 2012. They are going to be great!
6.) Team Heart Militia is your running squad, what does it mean? Well, Team Heart Militia was something I started for myself because it was a personal quest. It still means, if you're going to go through your own battles, you bring your heart with. Without your heart, the battle is lost. And as time went by, I would come up with my own design concepts, my own quotes and artwork on the shirts. To have a quote to help inspire many to do their best. I am very proud to say that I have 3 runners on my squad that do great and I now have 7 honorary members of my brigade.
7.) If you run while listening to music, what is on your playlist? Funny you should ask that, my playlist on my iPod is labeled as "workout" and it consists of many artists that get me going. I have artists like, Tinie Tempah, TobyMac, Chipmunk, Icon For Hire, The Game, Shinedown, Eminem, The Red Jumpsuit Appartus, Skillet, Living Colour, Pink, Avril Lavigne, Paramore, the All American Rejects, Rev Theory and of course, Kelly Clarkson. I listen to everything because I really do not have a genre I stick with. I am not biased. Just as long as I can relate to the song or feel their vibe in the music, I am good.
8.) Tell us something funny about you? Well, umm.....I do like to sing....and dance, at the most random moments. Call it geeky but music is my thing. There would be times where I would hear a song and I can't help it. Even though I get weird looks or laughs, I am confident in myself because it is out of fun and life should be like that, fun. And I would like to apologize to many who have seen me dance or have heard me sing before...I am sorry for that. I should come with a rating or a warning label across my chest. And I do make voices or come up with weird sayings, especially with my friend, Alan.
9.) Tell us something serious about you? At times, I am very grateful to be alive and doing what I love to do. There are moments where my reflection on my life is blurred and vivid because I had to grow up so quick and had to be strong at a young age. And that I have lost a lot of great people in my life and it sucks at times because they were always there for me, for awhile, I used to think that everything I touched, dies. But as I got in touch with my faith, I knew that just having them in my life was great enough to share what they taught me and stand for what they stood for too. And to this day, I still do not know my real father that well.
10.) What has been your best race? I always say this, because it is true. My best race is always my next. My races that I have done were great and phenomonal but you cannot put a label on a race as "your best" because the next race can be your best or the next one. I love my races, no matter the outcome because of my heart.
11.) Are you seeing someone special? Why? Are you asking me out? Just kidding. Well, at the moment, I just had a date with someone that was overdue because of various conflicts in schedules but who knows what is next? I haven't met that special someone yet.
12.) In your recent blog about losing weight, how did you go about doing it? What is your secret? My secret is this and it is not much of a secret now that I have told you. Don't think about the weight, think about the workouts. It is all a mental thing because when I started working out and running, the last thing on my mind was the weight. I was thinking about the next workouts. And next thing you know, I lost 14 pounds and then it was 20 pounds and then it was 30 pounds. And some days, I ate very healthy, raw vegetables, fruit, drank lots of water, I gave up using salt in my diet. It was brutal but it is the price you pay to run your best.
13.) What is your favorite movie to watch before a race? My favorite movies to watch are the Rocky Balboa movies, Without Limits, and Running Brave. Geeky, I know.
14.) What can we expect out of you in 2012? The very best that I can be. By April, you will see how great I can be and the great I can bring to many. Just watch.
15.) If you had a speech to give the youth who are looking to be runners, what advice would you give them? My advice would be my speech, that no matter how hard life is going to hit you, take those hits because if you can get up from those hits and keep on moving, you are already winning. Never sell yourself short because if you do, you're not going to cut it in the long run. The next fad is the next recycled item for pickup on garbage day. Use your heart, your mind and yourself to know how hard you can push yourself. And never lose faith, in yourself, your gift and your beliefs. And never give up, always give in.
Well, those are some of the condensed questions that I had to format into this blog without going into their email responses and to those who have emailed me questions, there you go. Some that are personal, I will email you back this week.
I hope you all enjoyed this new blog and to you critics, I am still smiling. Thank you.
Monday, December 5, 2011
A letter to my critics
After reading many emails or as I like to call them, "hate" mail in my inbox. It usually is my favorite but sometimes a bitter treat for my day. Whatever it is, it has be to be done because it comes with the nature of the beast.
When I started this blog and displayed my email address in a previous blog, I knew that I would get questions, comments or negativity. I knew I painted a bullseye on my back to some who became my critics. To some, I was seen as a person who was doing his best for good causes and doing what he could to help others in their time of need. To others, it was just a publicity act or to gain attention. And with this blog, this is made for you, to help you realize what I go through on a day to day basis.
To some of you who think I am a fake, a phoney or just a disgrace, as a matter of a fact, I have heard these words and many others growing up. Sure, it shocks or is bitter at times to take in, but hey, nothing new to me. I know that there are not many in this world that doesn't think highly of me or some who act nice only to my face, I just take it in as it should be, a chip on my shoulder.
If you think I am a fake because what I do is real just boggles my mind because if you could just put yourselves in my shoes, to take the many steps and run the obstacles that I deal with daily, your perspective would be different. On a day to day basis for me, it is pretty hectic, I work a full time job of 40 hours a week and on my days off or on some late nights, I work on fund raising, my workout routines, keeping in contact with representatives, keeping updated on events, working on the budget, and helping being a pen pal to so many of each charity. I even wake up early to do a workout, to help start my day and hospital visits because of my previous neck and shoulder injury and other injuries I may have sustained during my training. I even get my heart checked out from time to time again for my heart murmur, to help monitor it. I hope this helps you understand what is real to me when you think of me as a fake.
In this blog, you will never see me belittle you or call you out one by one by your user names or emails, I just want you to understand that some days, you may think less of me but there are those who count, my family, friends and many who think highly of me and that is what keeps me going.
And yes, I know that with my name, I should be doing great or living to the legendary status that my father did in his prime but in the real world, that was him, this is me. I have respected his career and I am now respecting my gift and talent. I may not be as talented as him in any aspect but that is just fine with me because if I was just like him, I wouldn't have been myself.
I have never called myself an icon or a role model. I actually wanted to inspire many to achieve their own dreams and take on the world in their own way because I do not want a carbon copy of what I have done, follow your own footsteps, why would you want the stars if you could have the universe? Shoot beyond your own horizons. And never give up on yourselves, give into what is given inside, passion, desire, love, faith....everything that is a inspirational success. I always challenge those to not be like me, be yourselves, be better than me.
And to the final critic, I do not do this for money or success because you do not see me on television or newspapers or any articles in magazines plugging in what I am doing. And I was blessed to actually be given a grant for next year's races because of each organization I represent and it was their offer, not mine.
Also, to the email from an outspoken viewer, thank you, my mohawk is pretty awesome, right? To you, I may seem like it is a sign of being a rebel or a punk but that is because you have been listening to too much Green Day. And as long as I have it, you will be seeing more of it, get used to it.
As my final saying to each and one of you critics, I say this with my full heart......thank you. Thanks for being as harsh as you can because you add fuel to my fire and that is what drives me. You may think less of me but I think more of you.
When I started this blog and displayed my email address in a previous blog, I knew that I would get questions, comments or negativity. I knew I painted a bullseye on my back to some who became my critics. To some, I was seen as a person who was doing his best for good causes and doing what he could to help others in their time of need. To others, it was just a publicity act or to gain attention. And with this blog, this is made for you, to help you realize what I go through on a day to day basis.
To some of you who think I am a fake, a phoney or just a disgrace, as a matter of a fact, I have heard these words and many others growing up. Sure, it shocks or is bitter at times to take in, but hey, nothing new to me. I know that there are not many in this world that doesn't think highly of me or some who act nice only to my face, I just take it in as it should be, a chip on my shoulder.
If you think I am a fake because what I do is real just boggles my mind because if you could just put yourselves in my shoes, to take the many steps and run the obstacles that I deal with daily, your perspective would be different. On a day to day basis for me, it is pretty hectic, I work a full time job of 40 hours a week and on my days off or on some late nights, I work on fund raising, my workout routines, keeping in contact with representatives, keeping updated on events, working on the budget, and helping being a pen pal to so many of each charity. I even wake up early to do a workout, to help start my day and hospital visits because of my previous neck and shoulder injury and other injuries I may have sustained during my training. I even get my heart checked out from time to time again for my heart murmur, to help monitor it. I hope this helps you understand what is real to me when you think of me as a fake.
In this blog, you will never see me belittle you or call you out one by one by your user names or emails, I just want you to understand that some days, you may think less of me but there are those who count, my family, friends and many who think highly of me and that is what keeps me going.
And yes, I know that with my name, I should be doing great or living to the legendary status that my father did in his prime but in the real world, that was him, this is me. I have respected his career and I am now respecting my gift and talent. I may not be as talented as him in any aspect but that is just fine with me because if I was just like him, I wouldn't have been myself.
I have never called myself an icon or a role model. I actually wanted to inspire many to achieve their own dreams and take on the world in their own way because I do not want a carbon copy of what I have done, follow your own footsteps, why would you want the stars if you could have the universe? Shoot beyond your own horizons. And never give up on yourselves, give into what is given inside, passion, desire, love, faith....everything that is a inspirational success. I always challenge those to not be like me, be yourselves, be better than me.
And to the final critic, I do not do this for money or success because you do not see me on television or newspapers or any articles in magazines plugging in what I am doing. And I was blessed to actually be given a grant for next year's races because of each organization I represent and it was their offer, not mine.
Also, to the email from an outspoken viewer, thank you, my mohawk is pretty awesome, right? To you, I may seem like it is a sign of being a rebel or a punk but that is because you have been listening to too much Green Day. And as long as I have it, you will be seeing more of it, get used to it.
As my final saying to each and one of you critics, I say this with my full heart......thank you. Thanks for being as harsh as you can because you add fuel to my fire and that is what drives me. You may think less of me but I think more of you.
Saturday, December 3, 2011
The Jingle Bell 5k run in Fargo, ND
Well, as I sit here, listening to my music and calming my legs down from an explosive but great day. I am quite proud to say that I ended my 2011 race season with a good note.
I left Washburn on Friday at 12:00 p.m. and arrived in Fargo a little after 4 p.m. and found the hotel I was staying at and kind of relaxed for a bit, looked around at areas and got to spend some time with my adopted dad. And to tell you the truth, before I went to bed, I had butterflies the size of eagles in my stomach. I was nervous because of the race.
After getting 7 hours of sleep, I woke up, feeling focused and turned on the television and changed the channel to the weather and seen that the morning was at 27 degrees but with a north west wind made the temperature at 17 degrees. I got my mind prepared and looked through the New Testament and wrote out II Corinthians 12:10 on a piece of paper and stuck it in my shoe. I felt a bit hesitant because of my foot injury that plagued me before Thanksgiving but whether I felt it or dealt with it, the race was still amongst me.
The quote said that even when I am weak, through the love of Christ, I am strong. My motivation for that cold blistering morning. I felt ready.
As I approached the building where the race was taking place, I looked around and seen a sea or green and red, I felt as if I walked out on Santa's village at the North Pole, it made me smile but what got to me was talking to others who were running for their relatives and friends who have arthritis. And also getting a chance to talk to kids who have arthritis and couldn't help but cheer from their wheelchairs. I felt proud to be there.
When 9:00 a.m. arrived, the chilly morning was making us all huddle for warmth but when it was time to run, I was behind the entire pack and the wind was against us for over a mile and a half but I kept striving for moving forward to the middle of the pack and after battling the harsh wind, my throat felt like it was on fire because of inhaling too much cold air. As we made our 2nd mile, I pushed myself to catch more runners and as we hit a corner of a street, I seen in a distance, the finish line and I kicked it in to the max and as I got near the finish, many hands were clapping and many came next to me to give me a high five.
What amazed me was, when I looked the clock for my time, I seen it was at 23 minutes and I was shocked because with my injured foot, I figured I would be running the 5k in 30 minutes but seeing that time made me feel great. As I crossed the finish, I jumped in the air and screamed because of my exciting discovery. And when I did finished, I walked over to the kids and gave them high fives and shook hands with the other runners and told them they did a great job because they did.
What made me laugh was a male runner came up to me and said, "From the start of the race, I seen you catching up to others and I wanted to catch you and just as soon as I caught up to you, you started to sprint and I couldn't catch you. I just wanted to say that you were a tough runner." That made me smile and laugh. I guess I never was approached like that before.
I then went indoors to sit down and that is when I called my mother back home in South Dakota and told her the news, she was just like me, esctatic. I knew she was very proud of me. My time for the 5k was my personal best. I ran the 5k in Underwood, ND back in August but that time was 24:56 and this 5k, I ran it in an astonishing 23:53. That made me feel great because I wasn't expecting it.
As we all made our way to the gymnasium of the Courts Fitness Center, I seen that our times and placings were on the windows. I looked at my name and time, I then seen that I placed 55th place and after 30 minutes of standing around, I noticed that the total amount of runners were 354. I could not believe I placed in the top 60.
All I have to say is that this was a great day to end my 2011 races and I am now awaiting for the races I have in 2012. Many charities and many tests of my heart. Life is a race, run it, see how far you get.
All I can say is, today was a day that I needed and I am so very grateful to be able to run this race. I believe in miracles and today was one of those days.
Well, I hope this blog suffices against any of your boredom and again, I can't help but thank everyone of you for reading this blog. To hear the comments and private messages make these experiences worth white.
I wish you all a happy night and a good rest of your weekend as it is late for me now. Good night and take care, be your own miracle. :)
I left Washburn on Friday at 12:00 p.m. and arrived in Fargo a little after 4 p.m. and found the hotel I was staying at and kind of relaxed for a bit, looked around at areas and got to spend some time with my adopted dad. And to tell you the truth, before I went to bed, I had butterflies the size of eagles in my stomach. I was nervous because of the race.
After getting 7 hours of sleep, I woke up, feeling focused and turned on the television and changed the channel to the weather and seen that the morning was at 27 degrees but with a north west wind made the temperature at 17 degrees. I got my mind prepared and looked through the New Testament and wrote out II Corinthians 12:10 on a piece of paper and stuck it in my shoe. I felt a bit hesitant because of my foot injury that plagued me before Thanksgiving but whether I felt it or dealt with it, the race was still amongst me.
The quote said that even when I am weak, through the love of Christ, I am strong. My motivation for that cold blistering morning. I felt ready.
As I approached the building where the race was taking place, I looked around and seen a sea or green and red, I felt as if I walked out on Santa's village at the North Pole, it made me smile but what got to me was talking to others who were running for their relatives and friends who have arthritis. And also getting a chance to talk to kids who have arthritis and couldn't help but cheer from their wheelchairs. I felt proud to be there.
When 9:00 a.m. arrived, the chilly morning was making us all huddle for warmth but when it was time to run, I was behind the entire pack and the wind was against us for over a mile and a half but I kept striving for moving forward to the middle of the pack and after battling the harsh wind, my throat felt like it was on fire because of inhaling too much cold air. As we made our 2nd mile, I pushed myself to catch more runners and as we hit a corner of a street, I seen in a distance, the finish line and I kicked it in to the max and as I got near the finish, many hands were clapping and many came next to me to give me a high five.
What amazed me was, when I looked the clock for my time, I seen it was at 23 minutes and I was shocked because with my injured foot, I figured I would be running the 5k in 30 minutes but seeing that time made me feel great. As I crossed the finish, I jumped in the air and screamed because of my exciting discovery. And when I did finished, I walked over to the kids and gave them high fives and shook hands with the other runners and told them they did a great job because they did.
What made me laugh was a male runner came up to me and said, "From the start of the race, I seen you catching up to others and I wanted to catch you and just as soon as I caught up to you, you started to sprint and I couldn't catch you. I just wanted to say that you were a tough runner." That made me smile and laugh. I guess I never was approached like that before.
I then went indoors to sit down and that is when I called my mother back home in South Dakota and told her the news, she was just like me, esctatic. I knew she was very proud of me. My time for the 5k was my personal best. I ran the 5k in Underwood, ND back in August but that time was 24:56 and this 5k, I ran it in an astonishing 23:53. That made me feel great because I wasn't expecting it.
As we all made our way to the gymnasium of the Courts Fitness Center, I seen that our times and placings were on the windows. I looked at my name and time, I then seen that I placed 55th place and after 30 minutes of standing around, I noticed that the total amount of runners were 354. I could not believe I placed in the top 60.
All I have to say is that this was a great day to end my 2011 races and I am now awaiting for the races I have in 2012. Many charities and many tests of my heart. Life is a race, run it, see how far you get.
All I can say is, today was a day that I needed and I am so very grateful to be able to run this race. I believe in miracles and today was one of those days.
Well, I hope this blog suffices against any of your boredom and again, I can't help but thank everyone of you for reading this blog. To hear the comments and private messages make these experiences worth white.
I wish you all a happy night and a good rest of your weekend as it is late for me now. Good night and take care, be your own miracle. :)
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